Friday, May 30, 2014

A New Day

I ended up going to a meeting last night. Today in my soberity sitting around feeling like shit and feeling sorry for myself just doesn't fly. 

I bet if I read back I would find a pattern in May/June of not feeling well. As many of you know I live in Arizona -  May is the beginning of the HEAT, and seems to chemically affect me. I don't really have a solution as of yet, so for now I'm just going to recognize it as a pattern and pray about it from there. 

For me the beginning of any change starts with prayer...... 

Thursday, May 29, 2014

It's a Pity Party kind of Day

can't find my computer cord, I just spent $150 I didn't have on gavin's football, I completely emotionally ate everything I could from McDonald's, I know I should go to yoga or a meeting but I absolutely don't feel like it. I am a fucking mess and I want a hug.

This is the pity party text that I just sent to a friend. I am having a shitty day. Ugh! 

Tuesday, May 13, 2014

God's Will for Me

Yesterday I was having a  conversation with my new boyfriend; (yes, I  have a new boyfriend!) we were talking about our prayer life and how often we pray for things other that God's will for us. We decided to try and go 7 days praying only for the knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out.

The first thing I have noticed is how often I pray - my thought are almost always in a constant state of prayer. For an alcoholic like me that is necessary to keep my sanity. This little experiment has brought to my attention how many things I ask for while in prayer.....seriously....."God help me with this, God help me with that ... blah, blah, blah"

I know God wants us to come to him with our troubles -  but I'm pretty sure we're not supposed to be giving him the solution to them - which I totally have been been doing.

Here's to my week of praying - without telling God what to do! :)

Wednesday, May 7, 2014

One Comment

One comment saved this blog. Yesterday I decided to stop blogging - partly out of self pity (no one reads it anyway, there's never any comments...blah, blah, blah) and partly because I really haven't had much to say.

Then I read a comment and remembered why I started this blog in the first place - it was to help people feel less alone.  

I still don't have much to say - but I will keep blogging anyway.