Lately I have seen first hand what the disease of addiction does to a family. It breaks it, it creates anxiety and fear in the heads and hearts of the family members affected. God, it's amazing for me to think that during my active addiction I didn't see that. I didn't see that my kids were worried about me, that they feared for my safety-so sad. I was supposed to be taking care of them, not the other way around. I didn't see that people walked on eggshells around me out of fear of my unpredictable reactions. I was not there for anybody, and to be honest only though about myself.
This morning I got up at 6:00 am to give someone their 30 day chip (And without going in to any details that would embarrass my Mom, I really did not want to get out of the particular bed I was in) but I did-I did because that is what I do today. I show up, I do what I say I'm going to do (well most of the time)I am present for the people in my life today.
Hope everyone is having a GREAT Monday!