Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Last night I wanted to drink, I mean REALLY wanted to. I could almost taste it. It took me back to the days that cravings were a daily occurrence. Scary, it was really scary. I have tools today to deal with cravings, but it's been months since I've had one. It could be that I am off sugar. I believe that in many cases alcoholism is a allergic reaction to sugar. So maybe that was it. But all I know is regardless of why, it scared me. I was in a safe place, with someone who would have NEVER let me drink, but still? What if I wasn't. Am I strong enough to do the right thing? Would I go to a meeting? Would I call my sponsor? Would I reach out and ask for help? I'm not sure...and that in its self it is petrifying.