Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Cravings

Last night I wanted to drink, I mean REALLY wanted to. I could  almost taste it. It took me back to the days that cravings were a daily occurrence. Scary, it was really scary. I have tools today to deal with cravings, but it's been months since I've had one. It could be that I am off sugar. I believe that in many cases alcoholism is a allergic reaction to sugar. So maybe that was it. But all I know is regardless of why, it scared me. I was in a safe place, with someone who would have NEVER let me drink, but still? What if I wasn't. Am I strong enough to do the right thing? Would I go to a meeting? Would I call my sponsor? Would I reach out and ask for help? I'm not sure...and that in its self it is petrifying.

4 comments:

  1. I think the fact that you are terrified means you would have done the right thing regardless.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Girl- I feel your pain. I wanted a beer by the pool last week something firece! I gave myself a hard time for several days...why do I STILL want a beer, even after I KNOW what it does for me.
    Then on Thursday, as I sat in my car before going up to my meeting I realized something....yes, sometimes I still WANT a drink. Yet, I didn't HAVE a drink. I am moving forward. I am making right choices.

    and there IS hope~

    {text me anytime!!}

    ReplyDelete
  3. You'll more than likely have these cravings on and off for the rest of your life, but it doesn't necessarily mean you will cave to them, as long as you learn to sit with the feeling until it passes. If anything you should consider it a success how far you have come, and continue to go. You can do it x

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hi Emily! I found your blog while checking out info on Lipstick and Liquor. I am also a part of the year Arizona worker (bald eagle nest watcher) and proud sober woman, DOS 8-19-09. I am always looking for sober woman networking. I use the Women For Sobriety program and wish there was a WFS meeting in the Scottsdale or N. Phoenix area! So many women could benefit from the strength based approach! Best wishes in your recovery and all that you do!

    ReplyDelete