I was praying this morning and I did something for the 1st time......I asked my HP to bless ME. I realized that I have been asking Him to love, heal, bless and touch everyone else in my life except me. Which leads me to my topic today.
We are not bad people trying to get good.......we are sick people trying to get well. That was profound for me when I heard it in rehab. I always considered myself a bad person and I sooooo wanted to be a good person, but my obsession with drinking/alcoholism wouldn't allow me to be a good person. This is simply not true. I consider myself a child of my HP and His love is infinite - whether I am good or bad.
That's why I have to "change".....and by this I mean my behaviors and actions.....Admittance (1st Step) + Action = Changes. And this works for me everyday. I have admitted wholeheartedly that I am powerless over alcohol and that my life has become unmanageable. I have done the admittance portion and continue to do so everyday. My life is more manageable today because I ask my HP to bless the words that come out of my mouth, put love in my heart and keep me sober TODAY. I ask these things everyday.....but I never before today asked Him to bless ME. I see that as progress for me. I was born with a different chemical and physiological makeup that makes me an alcoholic. But just because I was born with this doesn't mean I have to live "in it". I can change my actions and behaviors to get better/well. You absolutly do not have to stay in this disease.....but you do have to make some changes in your life to live a sober life.
I just wanted to share this hope with everyone this morning, because it was a startling revelation to me and maybe someone else can identify with what I was feeling this morning as I prayed on my knees for acceptance and love and blessings.
Hope everyone is hanging in there and trying everyday to do "the next right thing".
Hugs to you all!
Guest posting for Emily