I can remember waking up on Mothers Day hungover, tired, achy....basically feeling like shit and having my two sweet boys still running into my bedroom with the cards that they'd either made or bought for me....they both always had big smiles on their faces. The way that made me feel was absolutely horrible....I didn't deserve those two sweet boys' smiling faces or their cards. That's the way I used to feel when I was actively drinking.
Today and last Mothers Day were different.....those same two sweet boys came running into my bedroom with their cards and I was happy, joyous, free and able to feel proud of my accomplishments as a Mom. There were no horrible feelings of being hungover or guilty or undeserving....I only felt pride. Pride for picking myself back up when I hit my bottom and doing the next right thing....getting sober - and not for them - for me! If I don't focus on being the "best me" I can be, then I can't be the best Mom for them.
I wish I could relive those 4 or 5 Mothers Days that I was hungover, but I can't...I can't dwell on the past...I can only move forward, one day at a time, and continue to keep God in the forefront of my life, actively work my program, help others and love myself enough so that I am able to fully love others.
And that is my hope for all the readers out there on this Mothers Day....that everyone that follows here begins to love themselves enough to put the bottle down and begin building an amazing sober life that is better than you could ever imagine.
Happy Mothers Day to all of the moms out there that have been blessed with children....and to those that have been blessed with furry, four-legged kiddos too! Mommyhood rocks and so does sobriety! Hugs to you all!!!