Friday, December 31, 2010

Be Still

I am having a hard time being still with myself today. I can feel myself looking outside of me to solve my problems and feel better...I spent year looking to fix my problems that way, and know dang good and well it doesn't work...Boys, food, shopping (well thinking about shopping) instead of just being still with what I'm feeling.

I ran away from my feelings with alcohol for so long that it really bothers me when I see myself picking up other things to get out of myself. I guess it comes down to the old trying to get away from my feelings deal...-again!-

The saying that comes to mind is "Be still, and know that I am God."

Dear Lord,
Help me to walk through, and embrace my feelings with grace and courage.
I love you,
Emily

6 comments:

  1. I need to be still more often, too.

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  2. I third that!!!! Being still is incredibly hard for me....I need to learn to just "be" - Happy New Year's Eve girls!!!!

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  3. This was good that I came here...my first new years eve sins alcohol....yikes! But it's okay.

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  4. Good for you Anon....it gets better, and you can still have fun & laugh without it....This was my 2nd NYE w/out drinking and I must say that I had a blast last nite....went to some friends house, had a big panini sandwich bar set up, chips & dip, etc....sat around and talked for a bit...I left for my 8:00 meeting, great meeting, went back to said friends house and we played Apples to Apples and Catchphrase....it was awesome - we laughed a lot - others were drinking...but they "can", they aren't like us...and I'm okay with that.

    So glad you were able to ring in 2011 sober....keep on keepin on girl...one day at a time :)

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  5. Annette, I'm glad you're back. I appreciate your posts and your honesty. I'm rooting for you --

    I'm similar to you in that I relapse once in awhile. But I'm doing better, and I've lost 13 pounds in the last 4 months from reduced alcohol intake! :)

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  6. Good for you Anon!!! Keep workin just a day at a time and hopefully - together - we can recover....we are not alone. Not sure if you read my comment a few days ago where I came clean with everyone on here, but what I've been saying over and over in my head is the definition of insanity - doing the same things over and over again, expecting a different outcome...that seems to be working for me at the moment...EVERY relapse for me in the past 3 months have rendered the EXACT same outcome - DISASTER, SHAME, GUILT, FRUSTRATION, ANGER, etc...you know the deal....so that definition helps to keep me in the right frame of mind.

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