Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Gossip

I heard someone say something yesterday that totally made me pick this topic today... "Those who gossip with you, will gossip about you. I cannot stand gossip. I think it is imprinting your option or assumption about someone onto someone elses mind. Am I guilty of doing it sometimes? yes. But I am really aware when I do and it is something I am trying to eliminate from my life.

I ran into a little problem in my meetings/class...there is a lot of gossip and it started to PISS ME OFF! After venting about it, and letting it bug me for a few weeks, I decided I would handle it in a new way...I walk away. Normally people are to busy blah, blah, blahing to notice, but it's not my job to take their inventory, only my own.

I am such a work in progress!

7 comments:

  1. I so agree with you! My first job was like that. Lots of young women who talked too much, drank too much and talked some more. I knew everytime I left the group, work, whatever, they would be talking about me.

    It became so toxic I quit after two years.

    A wise friend told me that she tries never to say something about folks that she wouldn't say to their face. It is a hard but good rule.

    Of course, with my sponsor, as I am working thru issues with my parents or husband, etc, I talk more, air it out, but that is a safe place.

    happy monday.
    there IS hope!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I agree with you Emily. I do find that some of the groups I go to can be a bit chatty about other people. At first to be honest, I had no clue who they were speaking about, but i knew it was not a good thing, I just pretend I can't hear them. I do have to say I could gossip with the best of them, I think it is part of our DNA as women, but I am trying to cut it out and I always ask are you sure about that, most of the time I get a funky look and they say no!!!! The people that gossip do gossip about EVERYONE, so we have to all watch what we say. Emotions can run high at meetings sometimes and everyone has to remember we are their to get sober and support one another!!

    Great topic!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Yes it is a great topic doggielover & sit in on some "guy" talk sometime & compare DNA. No slouches for sure...
    Gossip is a national passtime & multi billion $ industry as well. Hard not to get caught up in it & hard to walk away & feel that twinge in the back as you do.
    My job now, hotel security, requires the protection of privacy & it has helped me in the think before I speak catagory. It still comes down to resisting temptation. Where have we heard that before? Some of the stories I run across now would make some interesting gossip, but it does feel good when I keep it to myself & do the next right thing...

    ReplyDelete
  4. I am new at this but my life has taught me one thing on stand upgossip - The only reason we do it is to feel better about our own life - It is that simple although we all do it. Okay.. the greater inner strength is what you and what we all should do... walk away. Perhaps someday I will do what I expect from my older boys and say ... regardless.. take the higher ground. Never easy

    ReplyDelete
  5. Ahhh, one of the gifts of sobriety. I never used to feel guilty about gossiping, felt I was entitled to judge? Huh??? That is some messed up thinking, considering I was in no state tbe passing out judgment. By the grace of God I am trying to be a better person.
    I am by NO means perfect, but at least now I can (sometimes) realize the potetial impact of my actions...on myself and others. Progres, not perfection, right?

    ReplyDelete
  6. Another Julie here weighing in on this subject of gossip. I do my best to remain quiet when the stories begin, not always successful, but when I do have a mis-step, I am aware of it and "call myself out on it". It's amazing how quickly that gets others to begin retracting their earlier comments.

    Actually had this very conversation this morning with my girlfriends while walking, we make it a point to not take comments away from our walks.

    Make it a great day!

    Julie

    ReplyDelete
  7. Awesome topic! My sponser said it best to me in regards to Gossip : What other people say or think about me, is really none of my business. That right there keeps me aligned with the God of my understanding. Isn't that a relief???!!! We get to decide, to be an example by not particiapting. Gossip can turn away newcombers & I have found for myself, it really has no productive purpose. Not to mention, it really doesn't make me feel at peace with myself after I've done it.

    ReplyDelete